Tips for Curbing Unrealistic Expectations and the Supermom Mindset
“She cooks and cleans like a pro, has a thriving career, and parents like it’s a piece of cake” This is the perfect description of a supermom, or at least what social media tells us. But how realistic is it to attain this height of perfection at all times? The answer is, that it is beyond impossible. The fact is, as humans, we make mistakes and have our off days. This can lead to an overwhelming feeling of being under immense self-inflicted pressure.
To be described as a beacon of maternal excellence is a standard most women crave. However, you don’t need a soothsayer to understand that it comes with elevated stress levels. This can cause havoc on your overall health. This is because mothers have needs and when mental health is overlooked, this can result in burnout or the onset of mental health issues. This post reveals some encouraging tips for curbing the unrealistic expectations of being a supermom and why you shouldn’t neglect maternal health.
Where Do These Unrealistic Expectations Come From?
Being a supermom isn’t something you conceive out of the blues. External factors play a significant role. These factors include;
- Social Media & Comparison Culture: There is a rampant need to emulate social media antics. Hence, it is common to conform to their beliefs and even compare living standards. Oftentimes, this is far from reality. This is because many people tend not to share their true life struggles on social media and can share controversial stories just to trend.
- Cultural/Traditional Beliefs about Motherhood: The need to conform to cultural beliefs especially when it comes to motherhood can exert undue pressure to meet certain expectations. For instance, imagine growing up with the mindset that women need to be traditional and doesn’t need to use modern facilities for house chores. This can lead to undue pressure and eventual burnout.
- Lack of Adequate Support Systems: Lack of support systems especially for women without formal education and parental guidance are the worst cases when it comes to unrealistic expectations. This is because ignorance can foster easy conformation to standards beyond human endurance.
Signs of the Supermom Syndrome
The following are some tell-tale signs that you have a supermom mindset;
- Chronic exhaustion and burnout
- Guilt when resting or asking for help
- Difficulty setting boundaries
- Feeling like you’re never doing enough and looking for additional responsibilities
- Neglecting self-care
Tips for Curbing Unrealistic Expectations
- Personalize what success as a mother means: Success means different things to different women. So, don’t fall into the temptation of emulating people because everyone has a unique path in life. Therefore, focus on the present and what you have achieved and not on what you haven’t achieved. Also, celebrate small wins and progress over performance no matter your goals.
- Set healthy and flexible Boundaries: This is essential because no matter how strong you think you are, everyone has limits. Thus, learn to say no without feeling guilty or like you are not being a good person, wife, or mother. Prioritize what is truly important daily and realize that there’s always another day for the things you couldn’t do.
- Ask for and accept help: This doesn’t make you incompetent in any way. Understand that some people have a higher stress tolerance and don’t compare yourself. Normalize delegating tasks and responsibilities to your family and friends when possible.
- Limit the triggers of comparison: You see that influencer/supermom who claims to do a million things in a day, resist the urge to compare. If needed, curate your social media feed to avoid seeing people who make you feel like you’re not doing enough. Develop yourself mentally and intellectually, start healthy habits, and remember that everyone’s journey is different.
- Practice self-compassion and self-care: Speak to yourself like you would to a friend, don’t condemn or criticize your shortcomings. Make room for mistakes and learning to be a better version of yourself. Practice physical, spiritual and emotional care. Nourish your body and fill the nutritional gaps with NATURE’SFIELD brand of supplements. This is all part of self-care and don’t forget to rest when you’re tired.
The myth of the Supermom says that you are supposed to be a walking-talking figure of perfection for everyone around you. However, the main aim of this article is to make you understand that as a woman, you don’t have to do it all or have it together all the time.
On the flip side, fatherhood isn’t a walk in the park either. But it’s not a source of constant scrutiny and unrealistic expectations like motherhood. Prioritizing maternal health starts with you and your ability to ask for and lean on support shows your strength. Therefore, never neglect your mental and physical well-being while supporting and taking care of your family.
